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January 2005
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October 2007

I thought I was strong, or at least I pretended to be
I thought I could hang on, no matter how tough it'll be
I thought I could have my mask on, at least till I get home
But alas, dear momma burst my bubble and suddenly, i felt so vulnerable.

No, i'm not upset.
O-kay, maybe a little. But I made a promise to someone that I wouldn't talk to her about it, so I won't. And, I guess it must have been difficult for her as well.

I wanted to keep mum about it because I believed that I could overcome it. I somehow believed that the wheels will start to turn soon, and I'll see the light again.

I didn't dare to ask anyone, not even those dear to me. That feeling. I just cannot get past it. Imagine your body being submerged in a cauldron of boiling water, as the heat slowly penetrates through your skin, your flesh. You just feel so 'raw' and there's nothing left to cover yourself. And f'course, you'll feel the pain.

But anyway, I appreciate your concern. =) I really do. That lil' gesture did a whole lot. I'm feeling so much better now. Thank you.

There are many others out there who are worst off, but they still made it. So, I know I will too. I will not despair. I will press on. For, I'm blessed with wonderful people around me and I know that He loves me. =)