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just did the mandarin test today. wasn't as difficult as i thought it would be.. thank god those words that i chose to study came out... haiz.. these few days my blog is all about tests and exams. so sick of it. k.. gonna stop talking about them already. btw, fara wrote me new testimonial for my frienster. Lemme quote wad she said...
"....she's a korean+chinese+taiwanese trappd in an arab+malay body"
what she said is so apt. I dunno why but i seem to be more interested in other culture rather than my own. i just find their languages,cuisine so interesting.. ( not forgetting oso the great looking guys... yummy! i noe i sound like a slut but i can't help it) i guess i'm more prejudiced towards my own ppl. the we-weets and dustbins culture just puts me off. I walked down the memory lane and counted how many GOOD malay friends I have and it seems that i have very few. Most of them are just aquaintances... you know the type of ppl you "hi and bye" and that's it. Nuthin else. Put me in a room full of my own race and i feels so SUFFOCATED! i really can't help it. Is there any medicine out there that can make my change my perception? Alhamdullilah.. so far the frens in my poly aren't part of the we-weets and dustbins culture. They are the only ppl left around me that can help to remind me that I am who i am. But... you really can't blame me for thinking this way. I just feel that the people of my own race (LEMME CLARIFY THIS: NOT ALL BUT SOME) are not ambitious at all.. As a result, our community lags behind.. We are more well-known for having the higher number of delinquents, drug addicts and higher rate of criminal behaviour.. Talk about education and we are FAR, FAR behind. It doesn't matter if one doesn't do well so long as you work hard. No one will look down on you. But if CHOOSE not to do well, then you deserve to be looked down upon. You can't blame no one except your own damn self. Its not only about education. We are also lacking in other social aspects. According to the newspaper reports, we have an increasing number of early marriages with even more of them divorcing less than 5 years later. Haiz.. divorce=family breakdown. You know what happens next. The children gets neglected and they "turn bad". Can't anyone break this vicious cycle? Why get married when you're not even ready to do so? You love me, I love you and then we get married. Is that really what it's supposed to be? Haiz.. I'm not saying that I am the best in my community but I just hope that we'll improve. Only then, will other communities respect us. Otherwise, our community will be stigmatised forever. Put in an effort. Everyone has a part to play. Yes, you and me. Lets hope and pray that the future, future, generations make our community proud. InsyaAllah.