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i'm so bored. monday nights are boring. tt's why i'm to enter some crap again. I had my viva voce for my mandarin just now. Alhamdullilah.. it was ok. Not as difficult as i imagined it to be. Managed to answer the questions pretty smoothly.. Tho this module is not included in final sem results, it's still best if I put in my best in everything tt i do. 2 more weeks. Exactly two more weeks from now and it'll be the start of my exams. can't wait to get it over and done with. wish i could have it sooner but i can't coz my brain's not filled up with facts yet. I'm just starting to prepare. wanted to study socio tonite but i guess i'm too tired. not only from sch but also some family stuff.. i just wish i could turn back the clock to a few days before where there was all peace and quiet. ahh.. forget about it. thinkin about it will only make me more moodier... soon, everything will pass. tt's the end of yet another crappy entry..

first and foremost, happy belated birthday to my mum.. she turned 44 on 22nd march. my parents birthday are 4 years and 4 days apart... tt's y march always make me broke.. its 1.05 am now and i'm still online. I'm aching all over and i tink i'll go to bed soon. Gotta wake up early tomorrow for breakfast with family at vista point. Aniwaez, i checked my frenster juz now and i stumbled upon a few of my primary school clazmates accounts. Saw their photos and my, my have they changed.... Haiz, pulled me back to those innocent days of my life. I'm just startin to wonder how my other pals, teachers are doin... juz curious to find out. How much they have changed... Both appearance and personality wise... ahh.. i'm feeling very nostalgic now.
aniwaez, i just did the asma test juz now and it wasn't good.. guess its becoz i studied last minute... felt really disappointed.. could've done better. But its ok.. its only a small, puny test.. still got my exams.. i can still do it.. (yesh moonie... i have faith in u) insyaallah. As tired as i am, i juz can't get to sleep. seriously, i dunno what to write now. i'm really having, as quoted by rashidah, a brain freeze. c'mon brain juice..flow..flow.. err... still nuthin comin out. i'll write when i've de-froze my brain.. n tt'll be in like... only god knows.

Today's my dad's birthday. So to Ayah, HAPPY 48th Birthday!! Semoga Allah panjangkan umur ayah dan semoga diberkatinya.. InsyaAllah.. I just finished my last ICA.. what a relief. It wasn't that bad... from now on, no more antoinette's ICA. YAY!! i was teased my group today... apparently, i had said the word ' basically' 9 times during the presentation. Can't believe tat they esp Shidah took note of what i said. C'mon man, it was an impromptu ting and i was nervous so.... i didn't even realise that i had mentioned that word many times. everytime they wanna talk to me they'll begin their sentences with 'basically'. Annoying but i still love them... without their crap, life's boring. Aniwae, I believe laughter is the best medicine. So, why not laugh it off? Life's short so why not spend it happily? When you're with your friends, i find that you should be more forgiving and not be too sensitive. esp when u know that your frens are very 'laser'. its hard hanging out together when the others always have control their mouth in order not to hurt your 'feelings'. It so tiring. Having said that, it doesn't mean that you could be rude to your friends or deliberately hurt their feelings. There has to be a limit somewhere. If its just harmless teasing jokes, nothing malicious, just laugh it off. Like fara always says, if you can't beat them, join them. i sound like an expert on friendship but in actual fact, i'm far from it. It's just the way i relate with my friends.
p.s: fara and the rest. It doesn't mean i'm letting you off. i've already prepared a voodoo doll each for u guys... so, beware! hahahahaahahaahahaaahaha juz kiddin la....

just did the mandarin test today. wasn't as difficult as i thought it would be.. thank god those words that i chose to study came out... haiz.. these few days my blog is all about tests and exams. so sick of it. k.. gonna stop talking about them already. btw, fara wrote me new testimonial for my frienster. Lemme quote wad she said...
"....she's a korean+chinese+taiwanese trappd in an arab+malay body"
what she said is so apt. I dunno why but i seem to be more interested in other culture rather than my own. i just find their languages,cuisine so interesting.. ( not forgetting oso the great looking guys... yummy! i noe i sound like a slut but i can't help it) i guess i'm more prejudiced towards my own ppl. the we-weets and dustbins culture just puts me off. I walked down the memory lane and counted how many GOOD malay friends I have and it seems that i have very few. Most of them are just aquaintances... you know the type of ppl you "hi and bye" and that's it. Nuthin else. Put me in a room full of my own race and i feels so SUFFOCATED! i really can't help it. Is there any medicine out there that can make my change my perception? Alhamdullilah.. so far the frens in my poly aren't part of the we-weets and dustbins culture. They are the only ppl left around me that can help to remind me that I am who i am. But... you really can't blame me for thinking this way. I just feel that the people of my own race (LEMME CLARIFY THIS: NOT ALL BUT SOME) are not ambitious at all.. As a result, our community lags behind.. We are more well-known for having the higher number of delinquents, drug addicts and higher rate of criminal behaviour.. Talk about education and we are FAR, FAR behind. It doesn't matter if one doesn't do well so long as you work hard. No one will look down on you. But if CHOOSE not to do well, then you deserve to be looked down upon. You can't blame no one except your own damn self. Its not only about education. We are also lacking in other social aspects. According to the newspaper reports, we have an increasing number of early marriages with even more of them divorcing less than 5 years later. Haiz.. divorce=family breakdown. You know what happens next. The children gets neglected and they "turn bad". Can't anyone break this vicious cycle? Why get married when you're not even ready to do so? You love me, I love you and then we get married. Is that really what it's supposed to be? Haiz.. I'm not saying that I am the best in my community but I just hope that we'll improve. Only then, will other communities respect us. Otherwise, our community will be stigmatised forever. Put in an effort. Everyone has a part to play. Yes, you and me. Lets hope and pray that the future, future, generations make our community proud. InsyaAllah.

I'm finally done with my bio and clinical tests. What a relief... A load of my back. Come next week tho, i'll be having my mandarin test and yet again, another Antoinette ICA. This semester's ending soon and the exams are comin. Probably in about a month's time. I really have to start mugging for it soon. i keep saying i'm going to study but i guess i know myself too well. I like to procrastinate... A habit that i can't get rid off. Haiz.. Time really pass very fast. In the blink of an eye, i'm entering year 2 really soon. I can't wait for the attachment. I'll be going to a surgical ward.. so it'll definitely be a great new experience for me. can't really think of what else to write now. so, i'll just end it here. Nite nite and and have a good rest moonie. :)
P.S: Special thanks to fara, fad, rashidah for giving their moral support today. I really appreciated it. To cheryl, thks oso. Tho u were not there, ur sms did boost my confidence. So thank you guys for being such caring pals.

I'm having a break now and in 10 mins time, i'll be bury myself into the bio books yet again. Haiz.. One more day and the one week break will be officially over.... I'm soo happy today coz i finally managed to talk my old pal... She's in san francisco now so its hard to chat with her coz of the timing. (u noe what i mean) Haiz... miss her a lot man.. we reminisced about our days back in tk.. miss those days.. wish i could go back in time.. I really miss the canteen there. the mee soto with the sambal kicap... Ooohh terangkat!! The four of us, sush, sok, jen and myself... we used to be very close. But now... everybody's busy. One's in San Francisco, one in jc (busy prep for the As and prob goin to Perth) and the other 2 in poly.... If only we could meet up and start talking crap together like we used to.. that'll be soo fun. But i guess, everyone now have their own lives to lead. New life, new env, new friends.. haiz.. I can't just stay stuck in sec sch life forever. Its time to move on.. to grow, to mature. I just hope that they'll do well in their future endeavours... Who knows... maybe 10 years or 20 years down the road, we'll meet again... insyaallah...

the taj mahal . first time posting pic on my blog.. juz trying out..

Finally, i'm updating my blog.. its been quite sum time since i posted an entry. Its the one week break and i'm rotting at home. Supposed to study for bio and clinical and look what happened... managed to study about only 0.05% of it... After this, i really have to start man.. I don't wanna fail my tests... i can't fail my tests... its really very stressful especially when people expect a lot from you... I'm just a normal being.. But i can't blame others actually. As a matter of fact, i expect a lot from myself. I guess doing well in my studies just gives me the gratification that i need. i'm not really good in other things so I guess i can only depend on my academic results then. Call me a nerd if you want. i couldn't care less. Before I entered poly, everyone was like.. "Poly is easy life... chicken man..", "don't study oso can pass". Now, i finally realised that those are bull****! Everything needs effort. Poly life does require STUDYING. So, to those ppl who have just gotten your O level results, bear this in mind. Poly life is not easy as you think it is. it requires lots of interpersonal relation skills and effort. Assignments are never ending and they can really drive you up the wall.(p.s: i have an antoniette's ICA that has yet to be done!! AAAARRGGHH!!) I don't hate poly life but i don't love poly life either. i guess the best part of my poly life right now are the bunch of friends i have right now. They just crack me up and help to make my poly life better. (thanks to fara, cher and all the p6 girls) They are the ones that preserve my sanity in the insane world. So ppl, find the right ppl to hang out with or your life in poly would be HELL!!